not attaching is not not-loving - claude anshin thomas

Question: In my relationships, especially with my cats, I realize that love comes with some attachment. Does the Buddhist teaching of non-attachment mean that this feeling is misguided?

Claude AnShin’s response: 
The truth of being a human being is that I am of the nature to become attached--attached in the sense that I am an integral part of this interconnected reality. The world and I are not two separate things. 

The question then becomes, how do I work with this reality? Am I using those I’m in relationship with to give me a sense of worth? Am I aware that as I am giving care and affection, I’m also receiving it? But if I am giving care and affection with the expectation that I get care and affection back--and back in the way that I want--I have failed to recognize my own selfish desire and greed, my own suffering. 

While I can tell myself that I am not giving to receive, that I do not have that expectation, do I have the tools at my access to explore my reactions when my giving is not met in a way that I want? Am I willing and able to pay attention to how I react? 

So, our life, when engaged in a sustained, committed, and disciplined spiritual practice, comes down to the basic reality of non-attachment and the understanding that non-attachment does not mean not feeling connected and it does not mean not caring. It’s about recognizing how our expectations and selfish desires create suffering.